Joanna Young over at Confident Writing is sponsoring a “4 x 4″ writing project I’ve been meaning to participate in for some time now, and the deadline looms near: this Friday, March 28^th (eek!) So if you’re interested, there’s still a bit o’ time left; just pop on over to this post for all the details.

So without further ado (because as you know, further do would make no sense whatsoever!), I present:

4 x 4

It sits. Poised, waiting; the sounds of its ponderous approach still echoing against the walls of the cavernous space in which it finds itself confined. Straining to leap, its cacophonous engine of destruction rumbling ominously. Even so, the beast awaits its master’s bidding.

Ahead: obstacles; empty, trembling, no chance of survival. Perhaps they can somehow sense the monster’s intentions; perhaps not. Either way, the outcome is all but assured: in a few moments, all will be over, and they will end their days as, well, less than they are now.

The moment has come. The mob, breathlessly anticipating the coming debacle, stand as one, imbuing the unholy event with the honor of their attention. The beast roars triumphant as, released, it leaps forward in anticipation of assured victory! The moment is now!

Striking the initial obstacle, it propels its vast bulk skyward; climbing, climbing, until at last gravity’s law reclaims its hold upon its ungainly body. It continues to sound its victory as it plummets like a judgment upon the helpless and arrayed obstacles in its path.

The force of its descent crushes the opposition, sending the beast rebounding into the air once more. But wait – something is not quite right! It landed badly, and now it is off center as it pounces on the next hapless victim. A cry of dismay can be heard just beginning from the bloodthirsty crowd, as if they can sense the beast’s uncertainty.

Once again, the raucous beast thumps to the ground with bone-crushing force, but now it is clearly in difficulty. Its normally four-footed stance is askew, tilting its body sideways, off-course for its next leap. It cries its anger as it rears up, tipping back into an impossible posture – and over still further – until the inevitability of its fall is evident to even the least members of the screaming horde.

Momentum takes over as the beast lands jarringly, sideways and suddenly, horribly, ungraceful. Its body rolls helplessly, once, twice – until it comes to rest again, miraculously, upon its unsteady feet once again. Clearly shaken and hurt, nevertheless it still manages to hobble from the field, staggering unsteadily around the confines of the area before its master guides it back to its lair to lick its wounds and prepare for another day, another event, yet another confrontation.

All the while the multitude, cheering continuously, overwhelmingly express their joy and gratitude at the valiance of the beast, and congratulate each other that they were witnesses of this day – the day the beast was victorious over its enemies yet again.

- (sound of needle scratching across a vinyl record)

Oh, wait – this isn’t what you meant, Joanna? Well, you did say “4 x 4″, right? Hmmm… better read the instructions again (sound of pages flipping).

Oops! Well, maybe you’d better tune in tomorrow for the, you know, actual 4 x 4 post…

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OK; perhaps a word of explanation here might be in order (sound of audience saying, “Well, duh – ya think?”)

I started writing my 4 x 4 post, and had this cool photo of Grave Digger (the giant, black-and-green car-crushing 4 x 4 machine you see pictured here in mid leap) I was going to use (cheeky, I know – but there it is), but somehow my fingers just started writing on their own! (To be perfectly honest, I’ve never had the, er, joy of attending one of these auspicious events – and don’t plan to start now!)

However, for this project we’re supposed to write about four groups of four things (hence the “4 x 4″ moniker) that inspire us. Sorry; I guess my muse must have gotten a ‘wild hair’ today. (Sometimes I hafta seriously question the sanity of my muse. On the other hand – it would explain a lot, don’t you think?) Oh, well; I’ve been planning to practice my fiction writing anyway.

So like I said, stay tuned tomorrow for the real “4 x 4″ post. (But if I were you, I’d keep an eye on your rear-view mirror. I mean, you never know where the beast might turn up next!)

And by the way, no actual “obstacles” were harmed in the writing of this post, the little dears.