Too Slow For His Own Good
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Have you ever made an assumption, only to get bitten in the butt find out you were completely wrong? And what’s worse, you were wrong in an embarrassing way? Well if you have, I want you to stand up right now (sound of five billion people standing up) and raise your left hand.
OK, while your arm is still up, raise your right foot and close one eye. Finally, repeat after me: “Boy, do I look silly!” (Bwa-ha-ha-ha! Sorry, couldn’t resist.)
Anyhoo –
A small boy living in a backwater town had developed a reputation for being just too “slow” for his own good. In fact, the popular saying went that if you were to offer him a nickel and a dime, he’d take the nickel every time! (Excuse the rhyme between dime and time. Heaven forbid we get too sublime. Er, sorry again.)
Finally, this one well-meaning fellow decided he’d heard enough, and he was tired of people making fun of the poor unfortunate lad. He figured it was about time the boy learned some fiscal responsibility, so he went over to the boy’s house to explain things once and for all (for his own good, of course).
When he got there, he pulled out a nickel and a dime, and held them out. “Which one would you rather have, boy?” he asked.
Sure enough, he picked up the nickel.
The man set him down on the front porch steps and very patiently explained, “Son, I know the nickel looks bigger than the dime, and that makes you think it’s a better choice. But bigger isn’t always better. The fact is, the dime is really the more valuable coin. After all, it’ll buy twice as much as a nickel! That’s why you should always choose the dime. Do you understand what I’m sayin’?”
“Yes sir,” the boy replied, “I understand.”
“All right then, let’s try it again,” the man said, holding out another nickel and dime.
After a moment’s hesitation, the boy picked up the nickel, whereupon the man jumped up, completely exasperated.
“What’s the matter with you, boy?” he fumed. “Why can’t you understand that the dime is worth more than the nickel?”
“Oh, I understand that, sir,” the boy replied. “I just figured if I started taking the dime, then y’all would stop giving me money.”
Hey, if you’ve ever felt like the smart fellow above who believed everything he’d heard about a certain little boy, well – hey, don’t worry ‘bout it! The sad truth is you’re definitely not alone here.
You know what’s really dangerous about assumptions, though? It’s that they can undermine something really good… like relationships, for instance. Have you ever experienced a strained relationship because of an assumption – only to find that is wasn’t what you thought at all? Yep, me too. (OK, all together now: everybody stand up, raise your right hand, etc….) As that great American philosopher Henry Winkler once said, “Assumptions are the termites of relationships.”
Here’s another thought that just hit me (sound of dull thud): What have to got to lose if you, um… I don’t know, let the sneaky little rascals go? An interesting fellow named John Seely Brown put it beautifully when he said, “The harder you fight to hold on to specific assumptions, the more likely there’s gold in letting go of them.” The truth is you’re probably short-changing yourself big time if you don’t.
Here’s one that happened to me: I sent an email to an internet friend, and they completely ignored it! Sheesh, what kind of friend is that? Talk about being miffed! And it was something I was hoping to get a quick response on, too - after all, it was, you know, like really important!
Well, first of all, note to self: what’s important to me may not be as important to anybody else. And as it turned out, their computer had crashed and it took several weeks to get back up and running (at least that’s their story and they’re sticking to it). But whatever – the point is, you really don’t know.
And now, thanks to the Fonz, I keep getting this image of termites munching away (sound of teeny tiny teeth going crunch, crunch, crunch…) at what was a perfectly fine relationship.
So now it’s confession time. What came to mind for you, and what happened? Dare to share a bit? The comment box is open for your edification; heck, turn it into a post if you like! C’mon, we’re all friends here…
You know, it would just be absolutely finer than a frogs hair if you would subscribe to my RSS feed!
6 responses so far




Well, I must say that when I saw the picture of Jefferson and you started to tell the story about some dim-witted child, that you were going to besmirch the President of the United States (which one, I’ll leave YOU to assume)! But before I had an apoplectic seizure, I decided to read the rest of the post.
Whew! That was close!!
Let’s try that again:
Well, I must say that when I saw the picture of Jefferson and you started to tell the story about some dim-witted child, I presumed that you were going to besmirch the President of the United States (which one, I’ll leave YOU to assume)! But before I had an apoplectic seizure, I decided to read the rest of the post.
Whew! That was close!!
Hi, Robert
I’ve been enjoying your blog for just a few weeks now. Great blog!
Your post brought back a memory for me of a ‘very’ similar incident (almost word for word, lol.) I made a big assumption, and it took me a while to move beyond my hurt feelings. The good news is, I learned from it and am more careful these days in making assumptions.
Now, if we could just get rid of *all* the assumptions floating around out there… Is that a crunch~crunch~crunch I hear? LOL
Thanks for the effort you put into your blog, Robert!
Mike, you won’t catch ME assuming which one you meant! (But nice try!) And you won’t get out of it by using presume instead of assume. (Once again, nice try!)
“Besmirched” - is that worse than being just “smirched”?
Dar, thanks so much for dropping by the Zone! I appreciate your kind words.
As long as we learn from these things, then I guess we’ll be OK. Hopefully we’re all fast learners! (*munch*munch*)
[...] of assumptions (click on this link: Too Slow for His Own Good), here’s a great story that illustrates how we all make assumptions, pretty much all the [...]