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I know, I know. With Christmas fast approaching (make that thundering remorselessly upon us like a runaway space shuttle), you barely have time to finish that last-minute shopping. So in the spirit of giving, allow me to help you out with a casual list of things you might want to consider for that special “oh-so-hard-to-shop-for” someone.

One website that’s hard to beat for cool, sometimes strange, but guaranteed pricey gifts is CribCandy. Some of my favorites are: the Carnivorous Plant of the Month Club (FEED ME!), the Doggy Judaica Yarmulke (Arf, arf, Shalom), and from the “I wish I’d thought of that” category (may I have a drum roll please?), the Mud Flap Girl toilet bowl flush lever. (Yep, you read it right!)

Then there’s the sofa train (I guess for those parties on the go?); for really, really careful drivers, there’s a glass garage door (hey if you live in glass houses…); to mix the crass with the class, you need these Christofle champagne straws; or for that always-fun “yech!” moment at your next party, you can get an extension cord that looks like a fish skeleton (third item down).

For the slickest way to make toast yet, you need the RollerToaster (you’ll love pulling this out and using it for your guests), and if you really, really love birds, here’s a cool heated bird bath. Then of course you might want to freak out your kids with the melting snowman canister set or the monster stockings. And then maybe a little something for yourself, like perhaps the world’s largest bed (12 x 10 feet!)

OK, now a couple of gifts for those, like me, to whom money is no object (after all, when you ain’t got any…)

How about a personal wax figure of yourself or your loved one from Madame Tussauds (about $270,000). Or, if that’s too ordinary, there’s also the chance for you and a guest to fly in space in Virgin Galactic’s SpaceShipTwo (I say chance because the craft still has yet to get off the drawing board) for only $1.7 million.

Ah, well, if that’s a bit too rich for you, there’s always last year’s fruitcake.

You know, it would just be absolutely finer than a frogs hair if you would subscribe to my RSS feed!