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Note from the Proprietor: This is intended those who have always wanted to try their hand at writing fiction. If you are already a fiction writer, please place both hands over your ears and repeat, “la-la-la-la” to yourself while the rest of us read this post. Thank you.

Think back with me for a few minutes (sound of millions of grinding gears – Augh! The noise! The noise!) OK, now back when you were still a child, did you ever think about what you’d like to do (or “be”) when you “grew up”?

In fact, I’ve always wondered about that. Is the idea that kids actually think about their futures one of those “Hollywood things”? (In other words, it’s only true in the movies or on TV.)

Truthfully – if I did, I really don’t remember it. Well, actually, that’s not completely true – back when I was a kid (that’s human, not goat) I do remember thinking it would be fun to be a science fiction writer. But it wasn’t, like, it was something I really really wanted to be. More like a passing thought.

But now that I am a writer (he said!), I find myself thinking once again: Gee, I wonder if I’d be any good writing fiction? Usually followed immediately by the thought: How does one begin?

Well, my fine feathered friends, have you ever heard of “story starters”? One of my down-under friends, Trevor Hampel, occasionally posts a group of them on his blog, Trevor’s Writing. Here’s a few example story starters he came up with a while back (all from this post.)

1. Mary stopped suddenly. On the path not five meters from her was a curled up snake. She stifled a scream. Her first impulse was to…
2. Neville strode confidently on to the stage. He was ready for anything. Just as he was about to open his mouth, a…
3. Olivia never liked James. His habit of…
4. Peter came unexpectedly around the corner. Both Amy and Bob stared in disbelief. Where…

OK, you see what I mean? A story starter basically provides a main character, a hint of a subject, and an incomplete thought. Now, all you have to do is pick up where it leaves off and just… keep going!

*Ahem* Allow me to illustrate how it works. Below you’ll see how yours truly picked up the storylines above. (All words in green - following the ellipsis, if you’re color blind - are mine.)

1. Mary stopped suddenly. On the path not five meters from her was a curled up snake. She stifled a scream. Her first impulse was to… look for something to capture it with. After all, she’d been dying to try that new Exotic Animals Cookbook she’d been given recently, but didn’t know where you could buy fresh snake meat. “Problem solved,” she thought triumphantly.
2. Neville strode confidently on to the stage. He was ready for anything. Just as he opened his mouth, however, a… bug flew into it! There was a brief moment of shock, then his body bent nearly double as he began to cough repeatedly and explosively. Unfortunately, due to his placement at extreme stage front, the coughing spell caused him to pitch forward off the edge of the stage and into the orchestra pit! In the ensuing melee, the hapless musicians suffered at least three black eyes, two sprained elbows, and one slight concussion. When Meredith saw that, she got up in disgust and angrily stalked out, vowing never to eat Italian salami-and-peanut-butter sandwiches so late at night again. “Next time I can’t sleep,” she vowed to herself, “maybe I’ll just try reading a book instead.”
3. Olivia never liked James. His habit of… licking his eyebrows when he looked at her was, um, disconcerting at best.
4. Peter came unexpectedly around the corner. Both Amy and Bob stared in disbelief. Where… on Earth had he gotten that amazing tattoo? It looked like an incredibly realistic third eye, right in the middle of his forehead! But when he got closer, they had the sudden sinking realization that 1) that wasn’t Peter, and 2) it wasn’t a tattoo. Suddenly, they had the feeling this day wasn’t going to turn out all right after all…

So what do you say, folks? Do you think I have a future as a novelist? As a writer? As a crash-test dummy? (As you can no doubt tell, I personally love tales that have interesting and unexpected twists. But maybe that’s just, you know, me. As they say in the disclaimer, “results may vary”.)

OK, ya got the idea? Simple, right?

Now here’s where it gets fun! Let’s try something completely different. Why not pick one or two (Feeling particularly lucky? Why not try all 4?) and see what you can come up with? No need to write an entire story just yet (although if you want to, go for it!) – just finish off a few sentences, or even a paragraph or two.

Go ahead, let those creative juices flow (and – yuk – don’t forget to clean up the mess!)
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Further note from the Proprietor: If you plan to try your hand at this, please let me know – I’d love to see the results! If I get enough responses, I’ll gather them all in one place.

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