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Have you ever suffered a serious disappointment in life? I’m talkin’ about one of those my-ship-just-came-in sorta things that you coulda swore (if your Momma hadn’t taught you not to) was as good as, well, guaranteed.

Sure you have!

I’ll tell ya what, Bubba; those times ain’t fun, are they? In fact, they’re downright painful - to the point of excruciation.

But speaking on behalf of those of us who have endured such trepidations, we can tell you one thing for certain: No matter how badly you feel, there is life on the other side!

Tough Times

Some years ago, the engineering job market in the U.S. suffered what’cha might call a serious downturn (which is a pathetically mundane euphemism for what it really means, to wit: it tanked, Bubba!). And during that time, yours truly, along with quite a few others, went through a period of extended unemployment. For me, it lasted almost exactly 4 years to the day.

Yep; you read it right, folks! It was a rough time, to say the least. Oh sure, every business cycle has its ups and downs. But never had I experienced such complete and total ineffectiveness at job hunting (other than, you know, odd jobs of various sorts) in my chosen field.

I’m tellin’ ya, Bubba; I tried everything! Alas, all the usual sources of jobs literally dried up before my very eyes. Even though I managed to land several pretty good job interviews during this period, unfortunately they never quite converted into an actual, you know, job.

Well… except for one… (flash of lightning, crash of thunder, sound of terrified scream).

First Contact

So what made this one different? Well, here’s the thing…

First contact for this particular position came from a headhunter. Now, I don’t know about you, but in my vast years of experience in the engineering field (34 and counting), whenever that sorta thing happens, it’s usually good for a yawn or two - at best.

Why, you ask? Well, it’s because headhunters generally contact so many people it’s hard to get too excited about it. (This is not a complaint; it’s just the way it is.) And, as most job-seekers probably know, submitting a resume to a headhunter is about as useful as dropping it into a quantum black hole. (Although dropping your resume into a black hole at least gives you lots of pretty colors as it’s sucked into infinity and transforms itself into gamma ray energy.)

Anyway, at first blush the job appeared to be slightly out of my area of expertise. Oh, don’t get me wrong; I was sure I could do the job. It’s just that I’d never had that particular job description before. And, after everything was said and done, more is usually said than done that sort of thing usually translates into a dramatic, er, lack of interest on the client’s part.

But hey, I was definitely interested, so at least the possibility of a job clicked forward a notch.

Nailed It!

Well, you could have knocked me over with a feather (sound of me, being knocked over with a feather) when the headhunter actually came through and arranged a phone interview. I mean, it had been so long since anyone had indicated an interest in little ol’ me, at first I wasn’t even sure I’d know how to act!

But when it was time to make the call, Bubba, I was ready.

I followed the classic job-seekers’ manual to the letter: I put on nice clothes (even to the point of wearing a tie), stood in front of a mirror (never sit down during a phone interview!), made sure I smiled a lot (believe it or not, they can actually hear a smile over the phone) - well, you know the drill, right? I’m tellin’ ya; I was as prepared as I could possibly be.

All that preparation paid off, too, because by the end of the interview it was obvious I’d pretty much nailed it. By the end of our conversation, the fellow I spoke with (who as it turned out, was the actual hiring authority) was absolutely convinced I was the right person for the job - and said so in no uncertain terms. I was the perfect combination of experience and enthusiasm he’d been looking for (which were pretty much his exact words).

Wonder of wonders, I was hired! Yessir, things were definitely looking up!

Well, we had talked longer than originally planned, so he had to leave for a meeting. So we arranged one more call the following week to discuss particulars (you know; those minor little details like salary, compensation plan, etc.) and signed off.

As you might imagine, by this time I’m pretty much dancin’ on the ceiling. My unemployment period had lasted over two years at this point, and the industry was still not on the recovery yet. Naturally, after such a positive interview, I did what anyone would do - I started to get my hopes up.

Hold on There, Bubba!

I know by now you’re probably way ahead of me. *sigh*

To nobody’s surprise (except, of course, mine), a week went by; then two. By the third week, after trying fruitlessly to contact said hiring manager (who steadfastly refused to return my calls), I finally had to admit to myself that all was not as rosy as it had seemed such a short time before.

All during this time, I was riding an emotional roller coaster, alternating between positive optimism and bouts of despair and frustration. I hope you’ve never been there, my friends, but if you have then you know exactly what I mean. It was a horrible time.

It was, I think, about five or six weeks after that phone interview when I finally managed to contact him again. (It must have been a moment of insanity on his part because he actually, you know, answered the phone.) Well, within approximately 5.92 milliseconds, I could tell my worst fears had been realized.

That’s right; there was no job! (sound of heartfelt sobbing)

The Back Story

So what the heck happened, you ask? Well, here’s the back story.

See, in the time between the actual interview and our planned second phone call (hey, it was only a week - 7 short days - a lousy 168 hours), corporate headquarters had put a freeze on all hiring. Yep; you read it right, ladies and gentlemen: there was to be no more hiring until further notice! (more sobbing, accompanied by occasional blowing of the ol’ schnozola)

Needless to say, I was completely devastated. I mean, there I was, not only fully qualified, but had even been specifically selected for the job! Then, just as I was about to step into my new role, it evaporated right before my very eyes!

I’m tellin’ ya, Bubba; I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry. I wanted to throw something. I wanted to - well, suffice it to say, I was not a happy camper. And I don’t mind admittin’ to y’all; it was probably one of the emotionally toughest things I’ve ever had to face.

Fast Forward

Ever had something like that happen to you? You know; when you were absolutely, positively SURE that ____________ (feel free to fill in the blank here) was really, really going to happen. In fact, you even saw it happening right before your eyes.

But then… it fell apart (sound of your vision shattering into a million pieces).

So, what was your reaction? Hey, if you’re anything like me (and sincere condolences if you are), then most likely you experienced, among other things, the urge to throw something, to climb to the highest tower and rage at the injustice of it all, or perhaps something equally Drama Queen-esque. Or, maybe not.

But here I am, five years later, and I can tell ya one thing for sure: I survived.

Yep; it’s true. At the time, it quite literally felt like the end of the world as I knew it. I mean, if I didn’t get this job - this perfect, wonderful job - well, I’d probably explode into a thousand pieces and turn to dust. Mrs. MZM would have had to get out the ol’ Dust Buster, collect my sorry remains, and dump me into the garden. At least my constituent elements might do the geraniums some good. (Or maybe kill ‘em; whatever.)

But to my complete surprise, I didn’t, in fact, explode. Nope; I picked myself up and, well, moved on. I didn’t know I could. I didn’t even feel like I could.

But (and here’s the amazing part) - I did.

Nothin’ to See Here

See, that’s the thing about big, traumatic disappointments. Oh, they happen, all right. And what’s more, they really, really hurt. Believe me, I understand perfectly.

But one thing I know for sure is that there is always a tomorrow. There will always, as long as we draw breath, be another chance for things to happen. It’s kinda like a big, cosmic Nothin’ to see here; keep movin’ sign up in the heavens.

What’s more; the thing you thought you couldn’t possibly ever get over - well, you may be surprised how what eventually happens can turn out to be even better than what you wished would have happened at the time. As a matter of fact, it’s always been true for me.

So what’s your experience been like? Have you ever faced a crushing disappointment in life, something that turned out totally the opposite of what you had in mind? Maybe you even, like me, had something literally snatched right out of the palm of your hand.

What did you do? How did you handle it? Have you managed to get past it yet - or are you still in the midst of one now? Let us know in the comment box, my friends; maybe even give us a chance to figuratively put our arms around your shoulders and say, “There, there; it’s gonna be all right!”

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Photo Credits:

A Bird in the Hand, by Mr. Hyde

Nuthin to See Here!, by shakti_truffle

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