Howdy, Bubba! Hey, if you're new around these parts, I just want to say how much I appreciate you dropping by! Oh, and you may want to subscribe to my feed. Thanks, and a tip o' the hat to ya!

You know, every month I give a party, and every month it’s the same routine. As I push the PUBLISH button on yet another group writing project, I can’t help but wonder, Will anybody show up?

I know; I’m weak. But every month, you guys overwhelm me with your participation, and prove once again just how interesting the Internet can really be. Way to go, y’all!

Once again, I am completely amazed by the quality of the entries y’all have shared! Yep, it’s another great turnout for this month’s group writing project: What I Learned From… People. A total of [updated!] 20 entries in all!

Below you’ll find the entire list; do yourself a favor and check them all out. Heck, start a conversation, why don’cha! (Almost) every one finishes the phrase:

What I Learned from…

… Salvadore Dali, by Amy Palko at Lives Less Ordinary
… People, by Trevor Hampel at Trevor’s Writing
… Things I have learned from… People, by Sarah Stewart at Sarah’s Musings
… I don’t understand people! – sometimes, by Karin H. at The Kiss Business Too
… “young” people, by Jackie Cameron at Jackie Cameron
… My Business Mentors, by Brad Shorr at Word Sell, Inc.
… No Impact Man, by Karen Hanrahan at Best of Mother Earth
… People Watching, Sam Brougher at Your Scared Seductive System
… People with Down Syndrome, by Debbie Yost at Three Weddings
… There’s Only One Word for What I Learned From People, by Joanna Young at Confident Writing
… People: The best mirrors of our lives, by Mike Botz (no blog – guest posted at MZM)
… the People we collectively call “our employees”, by Rosa Say at Managing with Aloha Coaching
… Kung Hee Fat Choy! What I Learned From Clara, by Rosa Say at Joyful Jubilant Learning
… the Blob in the Black Sweater, by Jean Browman at Transforming Stress Into Personal Power
… the Bass Player, by Pete Aldin at Freaked Out Fathers
… People with Magical Thinking, by Lillie Amman at A Writer’s Words, and Editor’s Eye
… a Physician with an Atrocious Bedside Manner, by Jeanne Dininni at Writer’s Notes
… People, by Stephen Sherlock at Quiet Poet
… One of the UK’s Best Known Business Authors, by Andrew Rondeau at Great Management

And last, but hopefully not least,

…a Complete Jerkbrain, by Robert Hruzek at Middle Zone Musings

Y’all give yourselves a big hand, my friends! And as usual, a big tip o’ the hat to ya! Be sure to tune in next month for the next edition of What I Learned From…

_______________________

So, what’s the subject going to be, you ask?

Well… ordinarily, I don’t announce the next month’s topic ahead of time. After all, that would be telling! But in this case, I’ll answer you with a challenge. The fact is, next month’s topic has already been announced somewhere right here in the Zone.

See if you can find it!

You know, it would just be absolutely finer than a frogs hair if you would subscribe to my RSS feed!

[Note from the proprietor: This post was written by Mike Botz as his entry for this month's What I Learned From... group writing project. Since Mike doesn't have a blog, he asked me to post it for him.]

Often we look into a mirror and what is reflected back is misinterpreted. We run with whatever the latest media induced craze seems to be popular at that particular moment. What follows is almost always some form of deceptive behavior designed to rebuild what was lost.

Back in ‘82 I was attending a small Bible school up in Minnesota, and while there I met one amazing person. The problem is I don’t even know her name.

It all started one day while on a weekend silent prayer retreat. Those words, silent prayer retreat, conjure up all kinds of images, but believe me it gets better.

The retreat was held at a quaint old monastery on a picturesque lake, and under any other circumstance could have been a cool place to spend a weekend. Let me also add that I am not Catholic (not that there is anything wrong with being Catholic), but this place was definitely Catholic.

I arrived by bus, so retreat from this retreat was not an option. The odd looking inhabitants showed each of us to our rooms, along with simple printed instructions for the weekend. My room was simple to say the least, and to my horror it didn’t have a television.

There I was with about 25 years of television/radio addiction under my belt and an intervention on my horizon, so I sat in my simple ½ motel size room pondering my next moves.

The instructions they gave me had a few Bible passages to read and mentioned words like meditate, and reflection. To make a long story short I decided to just lie on my bed and sleep till it was over.

When I woke up I glanced at the instructions and headed for breakfast. Somehow, due to missed communication, I missed breakfast and spent my morning upset with the world. You see I am a rather large man, who until this point in time never missed a meal.

I spent that morning wandering the grounds with only the voices in my head and totally oblivious to the beauty around me. At one point I sat on a bench, staring off into space, wanting the whole thing to just end.

I was wallowing in pure selfishness.

Later that day I met a blind nun, the person who showed me my reflection in the mirror, and it has helped me to this day. Often in life we have those special people who leave their marks on us, but this was different. This person was so completely unselfish, that she had taken on the image and personality of her creator.

She showed me it was ok to just be.

I know this sounds a little Kung fu, but this was such a revolutionary concept to me that it has changed my life. I just know there are people like me who feel like they have to always be doing something.

She spoke of life as a “journey through”, and not an end to anything. The whole “not our home – looking forward to Heaven” kind of thing.

“Enjoy the trip – look at what and who is around you,” she’d say. Even blind she could enjoy what was.

To this day I can sit almost any place and be – reflecting on His creation.

Oh, I can still get swept away with things that need doing, but it’s not hard to find my way home.

Look in to the mirror and what do you see?

You know, it would just be absolutely finer than a frogs hair if you would subscribe to my RSS feed!

[Note: This is part 2 (obviously!) of a two-part post (but there may yet be more!) about my experiences while living in Taiwan during Chinese New Year back in 2000. In case you missed it, here’s part 1.]

What’s a Night Market?

My favorite and most interesting places to visit in any Taiwan city were always the Night Markets. What’s a Night Market, you ask? Well… they’re a sortof flea market/ garage sale/ sidewalk sale/ carnival/ food festival, all rolled up into one. And oh yeah; they’re only (usually) open at night.

They are held on a street that’s blocked off from automobile traffic (although occasional motorcycles and bicycles are a constant hazard). During the day, the street may or may not look almost normal, but at night, the stores along the street (and anyone else who can squeeze in) simply move their wares outside. They are usually open until very early in the morning.

Street markets have an interesting atmosphere, in more ways than one. First of all, it’s sortof like walking through a kaleidescope. Lots of colorful clothes, various and sundry wares, and food stalls of everything imaginable (and some that aren’t!) are pushed at you from every side. Then, of course, there’s the smells – quite an amazing variety, and combinations thereof – at every turn!

Some Night Markets are more-or-less permanent; one in Taipei had a permanent weather cover built over the street. In other cities and towns, though, they only have them during special occasions, like New Year’s.

The Hsinchu Night Market

The week before New Year’s (which was on Feb. 5 in 2000), the city was literally in a shopping frenzy. You could tell the difference; the entire downtown area was filled with late-night shoppers.

Unlike Taipei, which has 4 or 5 well established and permanent night markets, Hsinchu only has one. It’s only there for about two weeks during the New Year’s celebrations. Luckily, it was only a few blocks from my hotel, which made it easy for me to enjoy.

One of the main entry points started at the big traffic circle around Hsinchu’s ancient Eastern Gate. The market extended from there (and down a few other cross streets) for maybe a half a mile or more. In this photo, it was down the street you can see through the gate’s arch, right next to the Kentucky Fried Chicken place (always a “safe” place to eat!)

On either side of most downtown streets are regular shops; hundreds of them were within the length of the Night Market alone. (Plus there’s lots of other streets with just as many.) Since this was a “special occasion” market, it not only stayed open for business until the wee hours, but was open all day, too.

The market consisted of two long row of booths set up in the middle of a couple of downtown streets that were closed to cars for the duration. Occasionally, though, someone drove his scooter through, beeping and honking his horn and causing all manner of (mostly good-natured) mayhem. Walkways on each side of the stalls were packed with people; I could barely get through.

Choices, Choices, Choices

It was almost unbelievable, the variety of wares to be found!

Some of the vendors used PA systems to shout out their sales pitches (even though most of their customers were only 3 feet away!) When you add the fireworks and firecrackers going off most of the night, the noise got pretty deafening.

One of the largest booths had a huge pile of ski jackets, pullovers, etc. on a big table. The salesman was shouting at the top of his lungs over the PA system while everyone inside was poking, grabbing, shoving, and pushing each other like a girdle sale at Macy’s. The reason: price per jacket - about $5.

Let’s see… there were also cell phone accessories, music CD’s and cassettes, musical instruments, books, assorted trinkets you might remember seeing with the label “made in Taiwan”, blankets, stuffed animals, scarves, tropical fish, cosmetics, gambling machines, and of course lottery tickets.

Other stalls had various types of: food, such as sausages, noodles, various vegetables, ducks (whole or parts, raw, dried, stuffed, fried, baked, roasted, barbecued, etc.; it was like Bubba Gump’s, except it was, you know, for ducks), pastries, ice cream cones, drinks, an Icee vendor, sweets & candies, dumplings, and many foods I couldn’t recognize at all. One particular area of the food market was called “snake alley” because of the, er, exotic foodstuffs available there. ‘Nuff said.

Along with those were selections of teas, herbs, flowers, and plants of all kinds, fortune tellers, toys, blouses, shirts, ties, socks, shoes, coats and jackets, pants, hats, wood and stone carvings, Taoist and Buddhist idols, temple-related things like incense and ghost money (burned as an offering to their ancestors), purses, belts, plus all kinds of backpacks.

Then there were various medical related things, like massage chairs, back massagers, back scratchers, actual Shiatsu massages, women’s and men’s, er, “enhancers” (but let’s not go there!), several doctors, acupressure and/or acupuncture clinics, and perhaps the most surprising – someone practicing dentistry, right there on the street!

In addition to this, there were lots of guys selling things out of suitcases. Stuff like watches, jewelry, bracelets rings, gloves, sunglasses, eyeglasses, little glass critters, and — well, you get the idea.

And to think; this was only on the first block!

Just to make it really interesting, there were also quite a few stalls promoting one or another presidential candidate for the upcoming election to be held in March (rumors, mudslinging, and outright accusations promised to turn the event into a real dogfight).

About a quarter of the vendors were selling New Year’s stuff - decorations, bamboo shoots (supposed to be good luck to have them in your house), paper dragons, etc.

The bottom line is, business is the name of the game, and making money the ultimate goal. Everybody seemed to be having a great time, though, so I would call it a success.

________________________

I guess the real bottom line, though, is that no matter where I am in the world, I’ve found that people are, well, still people. They love to have a good time, enjoy themselves; and just because they look a little different than I do - well, we’re really all the same inside.

I will always treasure my experiences in Taiwan as a wonderful, growing time in my life. Although I was almost exactly opposite my hometown on the globe, thanks to email and occasional phone calls I could still stay connected with Mrs. MZM.

But the place - wow, the place was utterly fascinating!

Note: If you found these articles interesting, let me know; there’s a lot more to tell! A big part of the Chinese New Year celebration is the Lantern Festival, of which the one in Taipei was the absolute biggest and most extravagant. I’ll be writing more about that amazing event in future posts.

You know, it would just be absolutely finer than a frogs hair if you would subscribe to my RSS feed!

Since today is officially the Chinese New Year (it’s the Year of the Rat), I thought it would be fun to write about some of my experiences while living in Taiwan back in 2000.

I was stationed in the city of Hsinchu for about three months while building one of the many semiconductor manufacturing facilities located in the Hsinchu Science and Technology Industrial Park.

It was my idea all along (before I had ever heard of blogging) to eventually write a travel book, or series of books, called Travels with Bob. So while there, I journaled extensively about my experiences, mostly in the form of emails to Mrs. MZM (who unfortunately had to stay home).

Alas, the travel book never materialized (although you never know; it might be revived one day). In the meantime, and thanks to the Internet, I invite you to travel along with me.

[Editor’s Note: This is part one of a two-part post. Stay tuned tomorrow for the exciting, thrill-packed, er, Part 2]

A Little Background

The Chinese New Year is the main holiday for this entire part of the world. In fact, most people plan their annual vacations around it. But not everyone stays put; many folks go to places like Thailand, Indonesia, or Australia.

Traditionally, this holiday is usually spent with families (but then, aren’t most?) Luckily, most people get at least a few days off from work (unless they’re in retail – but more on that later). Some workers get as many as ten days, and nearly all students are off from school, too.

Like Mardi Gras, the Chinese start their celebrating about two weeks early. Also like Mardi Gras, it’s one long party! And just to keep things lively, fireworks are as common as fleas; it was an unusual night when at least a few big boomers didn’t go off.

Of course, the Chinese don’t celebrate Christmas. But, I was surprised to find they treat it almost exactly the same way Westerners do, including a Santa-like figure that shows up at your door with money or gifts (everyone exchanges gifts, just like we do in the West).

Instead of gifts, though, sometimes they give each other “good luck money”: money placed inside small red envelopes, with good wishes for prosperity, peace, and success written on them.

To add to the festive look, all the bigger stores display their Christmas decorations until the New Year’s celebrations are over (usually sometime in February – I wish Mrs. MZM would let me keep the Christmas tree up that long *sigh*), and holiday music still sounds from the muzak systems. (Actually, it’s kinda fun listening to Chinese versions of familiar Christmas carols.)

It’s also one long shopping spree, too - unlike in the U.S., nearly all stores stay open for business throughout the holidays. Many keep later-than-usual hours to take advantage of the extra crowds walking around at night. (Why do they walk around at night? Stay tuned to tomorrow’s post for that one!)

Finally, The Day Arrived

New Year’s Eve was a many-hours-long succession of spectacular fireworks, hand-thrown firecrackers, and late night shopping downtown. Of course, I heard fireworks going off every now and then over the last two weeks, but on this night it’s pretty much a constant background noise.

Along toward midnight, they got more frequent, and much, much bigger. They didn’t have a big organized event like we might have back home, though; people just set them off whenever and wherever they wanted. Every now and then, a whole string was set off, lasting as long as several minutes. You could hear the echoes roaring and rocking back and forth among the downtown buildings.

Finally, it all ended about 1:00 am. I guess everyone must have gone to bed because I didn’t hear a single pop after that (also unlike back home)! But the next morning (which was the actual New Year’s Day), I was awakened about 10:15 (OK, so I slept late!) by a tremendous racket. (Not exactly my favorite way to wake up, but it certainly got my attention!)

Just a few blocks from my hotel (although it sounded like the room next door!), a band of colorfully-costumed drummers performed right in front of the main entrance to the SOGO store (a large Japanese department store). Evidently organized by the store management, there were also two official-looking characters standing beside the still-closed doors.

Well, the drummers did their thing (making quite a racket with the echoes and all), and while this was going on, several people set off long strings (about 50 feet long) of fireworks. Absolutely deafening! Everybody was obviously having a great time, though; even though we all had our hands over our ears…

Each long string of firecrackers took almost two minutes to finish, drummers banging away in spectacular cadences all the while. It was fantastic – they were really quite good. Finally, as a finale (the traditional ending), one last blast went off underneath a small decorated paper box, shooting it about 20 feet into the air.

The Dragon Dance

Then, the drummers moved aside to make room for a dragon dance. Usually, the dragon figures are made of paper, and can be as many as 50 or more performers long. This time, though, there were only two men per dragon (I found this video clip – very much like the one I saw), so it was an, er, “short” performance (Bwa-ha-ha-ha! Sorry.)

Of course, the dragons were quite colorful and elaborate – their eyelids and ears flapped away at the kids in the audience, giving them a thrill and making them and their parents jump back, laughing. They danced, jumping up high and dipping down low, and then it looked like the two dragons began to get a bit friendly, wrapping their necks together and bumping heads.

After a time, a man ran out in the street and placed a large red pail containing fruits and vegetables on the ground in front of the two dragons. He offered a pineapple to one dragon, who took it in his mouth. The other dragon was offered a different vegetable (it looked like a fat white carrot). (The pineapple represents hospitality, and the other one represents prosperity.)

The dragons then began taking turns bending low over the pail, while the crowd (obviously knowing what to expect) surrounded them, gathering right up close. Suddenly, one dragon jumped up, and candy flew out over the crowd! It was hilarious; everybody went absolutely nuts, adults and children alike! After a few minutes, the other dragon did the same with his pail, resulting in a melee of epic proportions.

Finally, the two officials from the store walked up to the dragons and offered each of them “good luck” money envelopes, then officially opened the store for the day. The crowd gathered thickly around the doors as they opened, pouring in like a human waterfall. You’d think it was a girdle sale at Macys!

[That’s all for today! Come back tomorrow for Part 2 – the Hsinchu Night Market.]

You know, it would just be absolutely finer than a frogs hair if you would subscribe to my RSS feed!

(Note: This is my entry for this month’s What I Learned From… group writing project. If you’d like to participate (and everyone is welcome), click the link and read all about it.)

Teams. Teamwork. Join the team. Be a team player. Go, team! What a team! Yay, team! – (sound of phonograph needle sliding across a vinyl record).

If you’re in business these days (or, you know, human), then you’ve likely had the, er, opportunity to be part of a team of some kind. Heck; even if you’re not in business, you’re probably either in a team now, or have been in one at some time or another.

I mean, teams is where it’s at, don’cha know. It’s where the action is, how the work gets done, and well, how interactions occur between groups and/or individuals. It’s life. (And if you believe you are NOT part of a team of some kind, then congratulations – on your delusion. But I digress.)

Anyway, lemme ask ya this: Have you ever found yourself stuck working with, or even around (well, let’s see… how can I put this delicately?) a complete and total, um, jerkbrain (flash of lightning; deafening clap of thunder; sound of terrified screaming)?

(And by the way, I was going to use the generic and possibly more widely accepted term “bozo” – except I didn’t want to offend the actual, you know, clown.)

“I can work with anybody!”

I’m sure most of us would like to think we can pretty much work with just about anybody. Hey, I can understand that; I feel that way myself, and I’ve had quite a few years to prove it.

After over 30 years in the engineering business, I’ve been exposed to (Eek! No, not that kind of exposed!), worked with, or worked alongside folks from pretty much all walks of life. Construction hands, union and non-union workers, office folks, PhDs, academics, engineers, accountants – hey, you name ‘em, I’ve probably worked with ‘em. (In fact, to my mind, that’s part of the fun of life. I just love the diversity of the human race, don’t you?)

But, I have to admit; there was this one guy…

No Choice in the Matter

Back in the ‘90s, two of us were sent down to Venezuela to audit one of our major contractor’s field records. When we arrived they put us in a hotel and assigned a driver to take us to and from work every day. Great!

But if we wanted to go anywhere other than work (not that there were many places to go, mind you), it was a different story. For that, we had to depend upon yet another (although it pains me to have to admit to it) American living in the same hotel who had been given a car. For some reason they didn’t provide us one (for which, after seeing how they drive, I am eternally grateful!)

Anyway, the upshot was that for practically every meal or non-work activity, the three of us were forced to ride and eat together; thus, we spent quite a lot of time together. Now, ordinarily this wouldn’t be a problem. BUT (and mind you, that’s a really BIG but) in this case it was huge because as I sorta, er, hinted, this guy was a complete and total jerkbrain (flash of lightning; deafening clap of – well, you get the picture, right?)

I mean to tell ya – this guy was (why don’t we count the ways?) loud, obnoxious, foul-mouthed, crass, rude, and arrogant – and trust me when I say those were actually his best qualities! In over 30 years in the business world – before and since – I’ve never had to be around anyone else quite like this guy (can you hear my teeth grinding when I say it - sorta like when Seinfeld says the name Newman).

It would have been comical if it hadn’t been so excruciatingly painful.

Don’t quite believe me? OK, here are just a few examples:

• I’m sure you’ve either heard of or known people who use profanity “practically every third word”, right? Ordinarily, and if you were to admit the truth, that’s usually (and understandably) a bit of an exaggeration. But with this guy it actually was every third or fourth word!

• Want to know his formula for how to win an argument (of which he had legion)? He would shout louder and louder until the other party gave up. By this standard (as far as he was concerned) he “won” every one – because he NEVER quit first.

• When an opinion was called for, his was not just the best opinion; it was the ONLY one allowed throughout time immemorial – and anyone who thought differently was shouted down in the most obnoxious terms possible (see the first two bullets, above).

OK, I know you’re thinking to yourself, “C’mon, Robert; I’m sure you’re exaggerating a bit. This guy can’t be real. Nobody is that bad!” But you’d be wrong! I kid you not; he was actually much worse. It was – almost – unbearable.

First, Put Away the Baseball Bat

Well, my friends; if you’ve never had the (c’mon, let’s put a positive spin on it, shall we?) blessing of a learning experience like this (and believe me, you can learn a lot about yourself if when it happens), then allow me to share 5 important things I learned. (By the way, all of these are very closely related.)

Manage your own reactions – My first tendency, when confronted with this type of person, is to push back – and hard! I’m not proud of that, but there it is. But it became quickly obvious that in this case, he would have simply escalated his volume and profanity levels until I gave up. Instead, I learned to manage my own reactions. It’s a little like breaking a horse to the saddle; when he resists (and he will), you give him enough lead to buck around awhile. Sooner or later, though, he’ll run out of energy, and then you can get to work.

State your case, and then say no more – Again, it did no good to try to discuss anything; he wanted no part of that. You were wrong no matter what. Instead, I learned to state my piece (even if I had to say it while he tried to talk over me – which happened a lot) and then shut up! Thus, when he tried to escalate things into an argument, there was no longer anything for him to “use”. Hey, I’d said what I wanted to say, and that was it. (Besides, it was fascinating to catalog the many different shades of red his face could turn.)

Speak quietly, but firmly – There is nothing that irritates an argumentative person than not being able to argue! Never raise your voice back to someone like that; it’s like pouring gasoline on a fire. Instead, keep cool and calm in the midst of the storm. Not only will it put them off their stride, but it will also impress everyone else in the room with your ability to stay cool. I lost count of the times someone would ask me afterwards, “How do you keep your cool with that guy, anyway?”

Sometimes, this technique may actually make an impression on the offensive person, too. At the end of our Venezuelan assignment, and as I shook his hand just before leaving for the airport (one last chance for me to be the bigger person, you know), he gruffly said to me, “Well, I just want you to know you really ticked me off. But you stood up to me and I respect that!” [Note: all 12 expletives deleted.] Sheesh, who knew?

Don’t go there! – Encounters like this, I’m sorry to say (mostly because I’m guilty, guilty, guilty!), tend to bring out all the worst in us, don’t they? Occasionally in an unguarded moment, I would find myself imagining all kinds of colorful or graphic ways to respond, retaliate, or just plain whack the guy (most of which involved serious bodily harm). But the more my imagination ran wild, the worse I felt; it was as if I was becoming just like him! (Anger has a way of feeding upon itself, you know; it can truly destroy anything it touches – especially you!) But once I realized what was happening, I was able to calm down, restore my spirit, and once again relax.

It’s a choice – When you get right down to it, who we choose to be is just that: a choice. And there are many consequences for the choices we make. The irony is, the negative path is actually the harder choice – and with the worst consequences! So why do some folks choose it? I don’t know, but the fact is many do. Whatever you do, just don’t let them take you with ‘em!

______________________

Nowadays, I can look back on that experience and laugh – although I’ll be the first to admit it was pretty tough to take at the time. But here I am, fat and sassy (er, so to speak), still enjoying what life has to offer. I can’t imagine that other fellow doing the same. Too bad.

So how about you? Ever had to be associated with a jerkbrain? My list of lessons learned is far from exhaustive; care to add anything to it? (And, um, don’t forget our G-Rating here!)

(photo: day51, by immy)

You know, it would just be absolutely finer than a frogs hair if you would subscribe to my RSS feed!

Here in the Middle Zone it’s the first Monday of the month (and possibly even where you are, too). You know what that means, don’t you (sound of drumroll)? Hey, good guess! (Here; have a cookie!)

That’s right folks; it’s time for the next edition of What I Learned From… (sound of crowd cheering wildly), an ongoing group writing project hosted here at the Zone each month that invites you to share something you’ve learned.

(Note: That link will take you to a special WILF page where you’ll find a complete description of the project, as well as all previous projects and their entries. It’s getting to be quite a collection!)

So without further ado (because further do makes no sense whatsoever) I give you this month’s topic (which should come as something of an anti-climax since you’ve probably, you know, read today’s post title already):

PEOPLE

Yessir, ladies and gentlemen (and I think that should pretty much cover everyone); it’s time to grab the writing instrument of your choice and commence your entry for this month’s project. Time to put on your thinking caps and tell the world about a time you learned something – anything – from a human-type person or persons.

As usual, you can pretty much write anything you like, as long as it illustrates a lesson (or lessons) learned. Be specific. Be non-specific. And, since I never impose a restriction on length, be as eloquent as you like (or as brief – my friend Troy Worman once submitted a two-word entry! The rascal.)

But most of all, be yourself – and write something!

Don’t forget the details! As is customary, this project will be open for contributions for only one week - from now thru next Sunday night, February 10^th. (And as usual, should you or any of your team be caught or killed, or, you know, break a fingernail or something during the execution of this project, the Secretary will disavow all knowledge of your existence).

To participate, here’s all you have to do:

• Write a new post on your blog with a link to THIS POST (uh, the one you’re reading now). As I said, feel free to be as eloquent (or concise) as you like. C’mon; show off if you like.
• Include in the title the phrase: “What I Learned From _____” (or something like that)
  
• Send me an email (rhruzek@sbcglobal.net) containing your name, the title of your post, and the permalink of the post. (To make sure I don’t miss it.)

That’s all you have to do! I will post the entire list of entries right here at the Middle Zone next Monday, February 11^th.

As always here at the Zone, there are just two simple rules:

1. For the sake of the general blogging audience, please keep it G-Rated. (Also please note: this is a request, not a demand, since after all it’s your blog and you can do what you want. Fair warning: I can choose to link to you or not.)
2. Be nice.

All right, ladies and gentlemen; you know what to do! Start your pencils!

You know, it would just be absolutely finer than a frogs hair if you would subscribe to my RSS feed!

When it comes to gathering information, what is it that makes you trust a particular source? How do you know you can count on the information you receive?

To help me get started on the right foot (since I’m, you know, right-handed) with my shiny new career as a consultant, I asked a couple of friends of mine to help me out with applicable tips, thoughts, material, etc. worth looking into.

My buddy Dennis sent me a short reading list, and one of the books, Strategy and the Fat Smoker: Doing What’s Obvious But Not Easy, is a new release by a gentleman named David Maister. As I was perusing the (ridiculously long) Amazon page, scrolling down… and down… and still down… I finally ran across the “customer reviews” section.

In light of the many recent “fake customer” scandals, I tend to approach these things with something of a grain of salt (not to mention the shaker and the entire salt mine with it). I mean, who are these people, anyway? And why should I listen to them? Are they even real? How do I know? Or can I? And what about Mary Lou?

It’s like that annual Publisher’s Clearing House Sweepstakes. How do you know those are real people? Surely you’ve had the same thoughts at least occasionally pass by your brain, right? (And yes, I know; don’t call you Shirley.)

When it comes to information sources, I must admit I tend to be from, well, Missouri rather than Texas. (Ed. Note: for those who might not be familiar with it, the colloquialism, I’m from Missouri – when not referring to the actual U.S. State, that is – is an Americanism that means Color me skeptical, or perhaps, Go ahead, Bubba; prove it to me.)

Anyway, as I started reading these supposed “Customer Reviews”, I stopped dead in my tracks (sound of me screeching to a halt) when I actually recognized one of the reviewers as none other than my Spooky friend Mike DeWitt! Well, you could have knocked me over with a feather (sound of me, being knocked over with a feather)!

But it’s what happened internally that’s the most interesting. Suddenly my attitude about the book changed completely (sound of attitude being, er, changed). In an instant, I went from “Hmmm… I wonder if this book is really all that,” to, “Hey, if he thinks this is a good book, then it must actually be a good book!”

(Note: No disparagement against Dennis’ opinion; I was already predisposed toward it from his opinion alone. But now I had TWO recommendations!)

So what made the difference? Why would I choose to accept what was being said about the book from Mike – and why I accepted Dennis’ opinion? The difference, my fine feathered friends, is my relationship to the source of the information! Because I know (and trust) the provider of the information, I can therefore trust the information.

As I thought about this a bit more (sound of grinding gears), I realized there are several ramifications to this line of thought.

Trust Should Be Uncommon

At first blush, this sounds like a rather cynical statement. Please hear me out.

We all know people we kindly refer to as “too trusting”, right? So what’s the problem with that? The problem, as you well know, is that when people trust everything, then they are easily fooled into believing anything.

You don’t need a PhD to know that such an attitude can lead to serious consequences. Ever received an email from someone you don’t know about a large sum of money hidden in a bank in Nigeria and just “waiting for you to send your bank account number…”? The prosecution rests.

No; trust should be reserved for something (or someone) special. And may I also add that the degree of trust is important, too. After all, that’s part of what makes trust such a special quality, right?

The Key to Trust is Relationship

If we trust a particular source, friend, company, bank, etc. it’s essential we have a relationship with the object of that trust. There’s just no way around it. You have to be familiar enough with what or who you are trusting to be comfortable with the level of trust you’ve assigned to it.

That’s why I have to snort (which is particularly messy when drinking a beverage at the same time) when I hear TV commercials assure me I can “Listen to Channel Blah News; with (name of Talking Head here), the trusted source for your information needs.”

I mean, c’mon! You have no actual relationship with this person, do you? How can you possibly trust them? How can you know that what you hear is actually the truth? Or the whole truth, for that matter. (Luckily, these days we have a vast resource called the Internet, filled with people who only print the *ahem* truth.)

I guess what comes to mind is the fact that in America, this is a Presidential election year. Having survived many such fun-fests over the years, especially the last three or four, it’s only fair to warn you that trust in your information sources is going to be more and more crucial.

(Perhaps you may recall a certain prominent newscaster who’s still battling the consequences of the loss of trust that occurred during the last Presidential election season. Talk about going down in flames!)

The Key to Relationships is Trust

All right, perhaps this sounds like a contradiction (sorta like the old chicken and egg question - which came first?). But I assure you, it’s not (go ahead; say those last two words three times really fast!)

Hopefully, though, you’ll come to realize the truth. Any relationship, if it’s to become a deeper and more fulfilling one, has to have trust as a foundation. But that implies that trust comes first. Or does the relationship come first, before you can start trusting? Hmmm… sorta brings to mind the chicken and the egg question, doesn’t it? (For which, by the way, I have the correct answer.)

So how can this be, you ask? Well, for what it’s worth, here’s what I think.

Trust and relationship are actually two sides of the same coin. If you’ll think about it, you’ll realize you can’t have one without the other. Thus, they must be different aspects (or manifestations, if you will) of the same thing.

Go ahead; try it for yourself. Try to develop a relationship without trust. Can it work without first trusting them to some extent? (And bear in mind, I’m talking about a relationship, not just a surface acquaintance. You know the difference.)

So what’s your opinion? Think I’m on the right track? Or, has my train of thought derailed itself, fallen off the Bridge of Reason, and crashed in Crackpot Gulch, exploding into an expanding ball of superheated steam?

(You might want to also read this related post: Consider the Source)

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