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In light of yesterday’s post, here’s a little story that illustrates one aspect of truth or consequences.

One day a carpenter decided to illustrate to his young son the consequences of lying. So he took him out to his workshop where he handed the young fellow a hammer, a nail, and an old piece of wood.

“Son,” he began, “I want you to hammer that nail into the wood.”

With a few strokes of the hammer, the boy did so.

“Now, you have to understand, son; every time you tell a lie, it’s going to hurt someone. It’s like that nail being hammered into that piece of wood. Do you follow me?”

The youngster solemnly nodded his head.

His father smiled at him and said, “I knew you would! OK son, now I want you to remove the nail.”

With a little effort, the young fellow managed to get it out.

His father continued. “Now, when you go to the person you lied to and ask for their forgiveness, it’s like that nail being taken back out again,” he said. “I want you to always remember this lesson, OK?”

The little boy thought about it a minute. Finally, he asked his father, “But what about the hole? I took the nail out, but there’s still a hole there!”

The carpenter gently placed his hand on his son’s shoulder as they walked together back to the house. “Well, son, those are what we call consequences. When we do something wrong, there are always consequences – and those never go away.”

(Photo by mjw)

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Have you ever found yourself vehemently defending your position (doesn’t matter what about) – only to later discover you were completely and totally in the wrong? Yep, thought so. I tell ya, there’s nothing quite like that egg-on-your-face feeling to really make your day, is there?

Small Change

You know those little machines you see at grocery store checkouts, the ones that automatically dispense exact change? Well, it happened quite a while back, but I still recall this one time when I made a purchase, handed the guy a $20 bill, the cashier counted out my remaining bills – but no coins came out of the change machine.

I waited a second or two, then turned to him and said, “Hey, where’s the rest of my change?”

He looked at me kinda funny for a moment and responded with something like, “But you already got it.”

It kinda caught me off guard. I had done no such thing! I was so surprised I indignantly replied, “No, I didn’t!” I mean, the nerve of the guy! I quickly got angry enough that I was determined to hold my ground. What was this guy trying to pull, anyway? After all, it wasn’t about the money (less than a dollar), it’s the principle of the thing, right?

Well, we somewhat intensely went back and forth for a bit (no shouting – it was just… intense), but he finally turned to his change drawer and counted out the correct change. He didn’t exactly slam it on the counter – but it was close. All the while I’m thinking triumphantly to myself, Man, this guy’s a real piece of work! What’s his problem?

Finally, satisfied that Justice (along with, you know, Truth and the American Way) had prevailed, I grabbed my bag of junk food (hey, I was still single at the time), slid the change into my hand, and headed for the car.

While walking across the parking lot, however, I put my hand into my pocket to deposit my hard-won change and, um… well, you remember what I said earlier about egg-on-your-face?

Yep, you guessed it! There, nestled in my pocket like a big ol’ greasy omelet, was the missing change!

I was so taken aback (which is an Eastern European expression that loosely translates to Well, whack me up the side of the head and call me gonzo!) that my feet simply stopped in their tracks. (Good thing there wasn’t a car bearing down on me at the time!) I was overcome with the inescapable knowledge that I had just made a complete and total fool of myself! (It’s one reason why I think of this as The Chump Change Incident.)

The Moment of Truth

OK, picture yourself as a contestant on Monty Hall’s Let’s Make a Deal (anyone remember that old game show from the ‘60s?). You came dressed as a banana (enduring numerous snide comments from fellow contestants - not to mention various family members) and you’ve made it all the way to the Final Deal.

You finally get a shot at the Grand Prize - there’s nothing left but to choose between two doors. Behind one is an all-expenses-paid cruise around the world plus $10,000 in spending cash. Behind the other one is an old rusted-out 1952 pickup truck filled with garbage.

You have 20 seconds to make your decision, while the entire studio audience is screaming at the top of their lungs at you. Which door do you pick?

Door #1: Turn around. Go back to the cashier, and admit the mistake. Return the change, withstand the glaring looks and the “Aha! I was right all along!” (whether silent or spoken, I knew it would be there). To basically take my medicine and swallow it.

Admittedly this course of action would be a toughie, since it required, you know, swallowing my pride. (Eating crow, as they’d say in East Texas.)

OR…

Door #2: Keep walking. I mean, when you got right down to it, hey, it was only a few cents worth of change, right? After all, the incident was over now. Besides, the cashier would forget about it pretty soon – and so would I. It’s ironic (which as you know is an old Scottish term that means made entirely of iron) that I’m writing about it over 35 years later, don’t you think?)

Besides, after investing so much emotion into just getting the change and establishing my *ahem* Righteousness… hey, it seemed a shame to have to give it all up now.

In other words, take the coward’s way out.

Will The Real Issue Please Stand Up?

You know, making the mistake isn’t even the real issue. I mean, we’ve all had the experience of being absolutely positively sure we were right – but *ulp* weren’t. (And if you don’t think it’s ever happened to you – then, um, this is probably one of those times!)

No, the real issue is this: When the mistake was eventually realized, what did you do about it? Did you face the music and at least make the attempt to set things right (assuming you had the opportunity)? Or did you just let it slide?

Perhaps even more important: What do you think the long-term consequences of your choice were? In other words, what did you learn from the experience? Care to share ‘em with us?

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Howdy friends; a bright and cheerful Friday to ya! Uh-oh; hey – why the long face?

Awww – are you down in the dumps today? Have things not been going quite your way recently? Do you feel like the poor fellow in this photo?

Well, ya know, perhaps it’s all in how you choose to look at it. Here’s a little something from that great American philosopher W.C. Fields that might help:

“Don’t worry if a man kicks you from behind; it only proves you’re ahead of him.”

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Are you constantly bothered by distractions? And I don’t just mean tempted, I mean you give in to them to the point where they actually cause you to lose productivity. Hey, trust me; we’ve all been there.

OK, even if you’re not a Star Trek fan (oh, the humanity!), chances are you’ve probably heard of tribbles, right? You know, those cute little bundles of fuzz (literally!) that purred like a cat when happy, but squealed like a stuck pig whenever a Klingon was near?

They first appeared in a now-famous episode of the original Star Trek called “The Trouble With Tribbles”. Here’s my favorite scene:

Kirk suspects that tribbles have invaded a space station’s important store of grain, so he and Spock head down to the warehouse to meet the station manager, Baris.

Baris suspects the grain has been sabotaged by a fellow named Cyrano Day Jaymin, even though he assures Kirk and Spock that the access points have all been secured.

But as he orders the warehouse door open, Kirk isn’t so sure. If the tribbles have gotten to the grain, there could be thousands of them on the other side of that door.

As it happens, they have, and there are. As the door opens, the hapless Kirk is literally buried by an avalanche of tribbles.

BARIS (aghast): There must be thousands.
KIRK: Hundreds of thousands.
SPOCK: One million, seven hundred and seventy-one thousand, five hundred and sixty-one.
KIRK (looks at him): Oh really?
SPOCK (continuing): That’s assuming one tribble with an average litter of ten, every twelve hours for a period of three days.
KIRK (knowingly): Oh. (continuing) Mr. Spock… (Spock looks up) We have two things to do. (pause) First, capture Cyrano Day Jaymin… (another pause) and second… somebody close that door! [emphasis mine]

OK, let’s return from the 23rd century for a few minutes and think about tribbles.

Well, first of all, what’s not to like about the little darlings? They were cute, soft, and lovable; when stroked or petted, they imparted a sense of satisfaction and well-being to the person holding them (even the non-emotional Mr. Spock was affected); they even purred like a kitten when well-fed and content! All of which would immediately earned tribbles a rather high ranking on the Cuteness scale.

So, just what was the trouble with tribbles, anyway?

The problem, as it turned out, was that if you fed them (even a tiny amount)… well, they reproduced. Within hours. A lot! In only three days, as our helpful Vulcan friend Mr. Spock pointed out, a single tribble became millions; a veritable plague of the little critters that literally ate every available foodstuff in sight.

So what does that have to do with me, you ask? Well, nothing, really. I mean, there’s no such thing as tribbles, right? But what if… well, what if we think of tribbles as the metaphorical equivalent of something else?

What if distractions were tribbles?

OK, perhaps that’s a bit too tortured an illustration, but humor me bear with me a bit.

Like tribbles, distractions are things that are interesting enough to gain and keep your attention; you even gain a sense of satisfaction and well-being from them (otherwise you wouldn’t stay distracted for long).

Distractions also have a way of multiplying over time, too. And, while it may be a stretch to say that distractions purr like a kitten, (unless, of course, your distraction is a kitten!), there’s a sort of feedback loop that keeps you coming back for more.

So what’s the solution? Well, while I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t always succeed at it, the solution is actually pretty simple.

Shut the door!

The thing is it’s still up to us to do our part to reduce distractions to the minimum. And by all means, if there’s any way to shut ‘em out, well, you’d better bar the door, baby!

So what is (or was) your most persistent tribble? How did you shut the door on it (assuming you have, that is)? What’s your advice to others who are still, um, petting the same tribble?

How do (or did) you reach that place where, if you’ll pardon the expression (and here you have to use Enterprise’s Chief Engineer Montgomery Scott’s voice), “There’d be no tribbles at all”?

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Note from the Proprietor: This is intended those who have always wanted to try their hand at writing fiction. If you are already a fiction writer, please place both hands over your ears and repeat, “la-la-la-la” to yourself while the rest of us read this post. Thank you.

Think back with me for a few minutes (sound of millions of grinding gears – Augh! The noise! The noise!) OK, now back when you were still a child, did you ever think about what you’d like to do (or “be”) when you “grew up”?

In fact, I’ve always wondered about that. Is the idea that kids actually think about their futures one of those “Hollywood things”? (In other words, it’s only true in the movies or on TV.)

Truthfully – if I did, I really don’t remember it. Well, actually, that’s not completely true – back when I was a kid (that’s human, not goat) I do remember thinking it would be fun to be a science fiction writer. But it wasn’t, like, it was something I really really wanted to be. More like a passing thought.

But now that I am a writer (he said!), I find myself thinking once again: Gee, I wonder if I’d be any good writing fiction? Usually followed immediately by the thought: How does one begin?

Well, my fine feathered friends, have you ever heard of “story starters”? One of my down-under friends, Trevor Hampel, occasionally posts a group of them on his blog, Trevor’s Writing. Here’s a few example story starters he came up with a while back (all from this post.)

1. Mary stopped suddenly. On the path not five meters from her was a curled up snake. She stifled a scream. Her first impulse was to…
2. Neville strode confidently on to the stage. He was ready for anything. Just as he was about to open his mouth, a…
3. Olivia never liked James. His habit of…
4. Peter came unexpectedly around the corner. Both Amy and Bob stared in disbelief. Where…

OK, you see what I mean? A story starter basically provides a main character, a hint of a subject, and an incomplete thought. Now, all you have to do is pick up where it leaves off and just… keep going!

*Ahem* Allow me to illustrate how it works. Below you’ll see how yours truly picked up the storylines above. (All words in green - following the ellipsis, if you’re color blind - are mine.)

1. Mary stopped suddenly. On the path not five meters from her was a curled up snake. She stifled a scream. Her first impulse was to… look for something to capture it with. After all, she’d been dying to try that new Exotic Animals Cookbook she’d been given recently, but didn’t know where you could buy fresh snake meat. “Problem solved,” she thought triumphantly.
2. Neville strode confidently on to the stage. He was ready for anything. Just as he opened his mouth, however, a… bug flew into it! There was a brief moment of shock, then his body bent nearly double as he began to cough repeatedly and explosively. Unfortunately, due to his placement at extreme stage front, the coughing spell caused him to pitch forward off the edge of the stage and into the orchestra pit! In the ensuing melee, the hapless musicians suffered at least three black eyes, two sprained elbows, and one slight concussion. When Meredith saw that, she got up in disgust and angrily stalked out, vowing never to eat Italian salami-and-peanut-butter sandwiches so late at night again. “Next time I can’t sleep,” she vowed to herself, “maybe I’ll just try reading a book instead.”
3. Olivia never liked James. His habit of… licking his eyebrows when he looked at her was, um, disconcerting at best.
4. Peter came unexpectedly around the corner. Both Amy and Bob stared in disbelief. Where… on Earth had he gotten that amazing tattoo? It looked like an incredibly realistic third eye, right in the middle of his forehead! But when he got closer, they had the sudden sinking realization that 1) that wasn’t Peter, and 2) it wasn’t a tattoo. Suddenly, they had the feeling this day wasn’t going to turn out all right after all…

So what do you say, folks? Do you think I have a future as a novelist? As a writer? As a crash-test dummy? (As you can no doubt tell, I personally love tales that have interesting and unexpected twists. But maybe that’s just, you know, me. As they say in the disclaimer, “results may vary”.)

OK, ya got the idea? Simple, right?

Now here’s where it gets fun! Let’s try something completely different. Why not pick one or two (Feeling particularly lucky? Why not try all 4?) and see what you can come up with? No need to write an entire story just yet (although if you want to, go for it!) – just finish off a few sentences, or even a paragraph or two.

Go ahead, let those creative juices flow (and – yuk – don’t forget to clean up the mess!)
__________________________
Further note from the Proprietor: If you plan to try your hand at this, please let me know – I’d love to see the results! If I get enough responses, I’ll gather them all in one place.

You know, it would just be absolutely finer than a frogs hair if you would subscribe to my RSS feed!

Congratulations, everyone; yet another great writing project is in the can (sound of lid closing with a loud slam - followed by muffled cries for help). And I gotta tell ya: Wow; well done!

It’s another great turnout for this month’s topic: Anything at all!; a total of 23 entries in all (cue the fireworks - it’s a new record)!

Once again, I am honored by your participation in our monthly What I Learned From… group writing projects here at the Middle Zone! Particularly interesting are the wide range of subjects (not to mention writing styles). Also, this month there’s lots of new faces, too! (Which always leave me wondering; gee, did I run off the old ones? Oh, say it ain’t so!)

An as always, my heartfelt thanks for your quality contributions to the General Body of Knowledge!

Anyway, here’s the entire list of entries (more-or-less in order of receipt discovery). Do yourself a favor and take the time to check them all out. Heck, start a conversation, why don’cha! Each and every one finishes the phrase:

What I Learned from…

… the Moonflower, by Anna at Anna’s Attic
… My First Sales Mentor, by Brad Shorr at Word Sell, Inc.
… Fighting With My Neighbor, by Genesis at her At Home Mom Blog
… a Currency, by Karin H. at The Kiss Business Too
… Signing Up For NaNoWriMo, by CSS at Here to Create
… John Wayne (or, Pulling the Trigger), by GL Hoffman at What Would Dad Say
… Life, by Patrizia at VOIP
… My 4-Month Old Daughter, by Eric Peterson at Leadership and Other Ramblings
… Starting Several Businesses, by John Crickett at Business Opportunities and Ideas
… Ellen Weber, by Robyn McMaster at Brain Based Biz
… Eavesdropping, by Bob Loch at Leadership Ramblings
… A Hole in the Sky, by Mike DeWitt at Spooky Action
… World Pool, by Derrick Kwa at Sui Generis
… Reading The Age of Conversation, by J. Erik Potter at J. Erik Potter
… Rejection, by Lillie Ammann at A Writer’s Words, An Editor’s Eye
… Robert Hruzek, by Troy Worman at Orbit Now!
… Cloud, by Edith Brown at Jeteak Press Writer Blog
… My Son, by Dana Hanley at Principled Discovery
… Being Downsized, by Jean Browman at Stress to Power
… Podcasting, by Joanna Young at Confident Writing
… Waiting Backstage, by Jon Swanson at Levite Chronicles

And of course, last (but hopefully not least) –
… Striking Out on My Own, by Robert Hruzek at Middle Zone Musings
What the heck, here’s a bonus post, too –
… Bob Ledbetter, by Robert Hruzek at Middle Zone Musings

Y’all go ahead and give yourselves a big hand, my friends; and as always, a big tip O’ the hat to ya! So what’s next month’s topic going to be, you ask? Well… that would be telling!

Don’t forget to tune in the first Monday of EVERY month for the next What I Learned From… group writing project.

Come to think of it, while you’re at it why not tune in pretty much every day? You just might be glad you did. Then again, you might not – but what’s life without a little risk, eh?

You know, it would just be absolutely finer than a frogs hair if you would subscribe to my RSS feed!

Hey, just a little reminder that there are only two days left in this month’s What I Learned From… group writing project! Better get a move on, friends, or you’ll be left out!

I’ll be accepting entries until midnight (CST, -6 GMT) Sunday night, so don’t wait too long!

You know, it would just be absolutely finer than a frogs hair if you would subscribe to my RSS feed!