[Note from the proprietor: this is my entry in this month's What I Learned From... group writing project. If you'd care to participate (and you're welcome to!), just click on that cute little link up there and read all about it.]

As you know, the Main Thing is to always keep the Main Thing the Main Thing, right? And the Main Thing here at the Middle Zone is lessons learned, from that universal schoolmaster we know as life. Not only that, we encourage you to tell your stories as well. After all, the whole point of our What I Learned From… series is there are lessons to be learned pretty much anywhere. All it really takes is to pay attention.

However, unlike “normal” writing projects (as if you can call anything we do around here normal), instead of a single topic, this month there’s lots to choose from. So as I began to ponder the list of topics above (in case you were wondering what that grinding noise was), it suddenly hit me (sound of dull thud): I’ve learned something from every one!

So, without further ado (because further do would be just plain silly) I give you: What I Learned From All Kinds of Stuff:

School

Well, it kinda goes without saying that we all learned something in school, right? Reading, writing, arithmetic – I mean, that’s the whole point. But what’cha might call an education is not the only things I learned, if you know what I mean. There were a few other pretty important things… such as: 1) Chalk does not taste good (don’t ask!), and 2) there’s an incredible amount of pressure put on kids to conform. My advice is to teach them early: it’s OK to be different. Wish I’d learned that one earlier.

Television

Honestly now, don’t you think Television has kinda gone to the dogs lately? (Er, no offense intended to dogs.) I mean, with all the so-called “reality” shows, crime dramas, brainless comedies and “news” shows – well, it ain’t pretty! But in my opinion, it’s also a somewhat disquieting indicator of where society is headed at the moment (shakes head sadly). Too bad.

Movies

Mrs. MZM and I love old movies. You know; the sort of thing you find on TCM. Despite the fact that these are all imaginary worlds, there are still plenty of powerful lessons that can be gleaned, if you just pay attention. For instance, if you’ve ever been caught between a rock and a hard place, watch (and take notes!) how Humphrey Bogart handles a humdinger of a pickle in Casablanca. Or, if your spouse were to come back from the dead (so to speak), you can learn how not to handle it from Cary Grant in My Favorite Wife.

Planes

When I was little, my first experience with air travel went something like this: I was taken to a place I’d never been before, followed a bunch of people into a long, narrow room with lots of seats, sat down, buckled in, and read a book. About an hour later, I got up, followed everyone out of that room and voila! I was in a completely different place! Amazing! It was like… a Star Trek transporter. (Except without the, you know, cool sound effects. And it took longer.) But still… on that day I discovered the whole world was within reach – and I wanted to see it all!

Trains

It’s actually one of my favorite ways to sightsee – to simply have a seat and let the scenery come to me. Man, you can’t beat that with a stick! The only problem is, when I see something interesting, it disappears pretty quickly and I can’t go back. *Sigh* I think it’s a good lesson, though. Life is like that train, and if you don’t get a good look at the scenery, you may miss something good.

Automobiles

I owned a car many years ago that developed an intermittent electrical problem that made getting anywhere a rather chancy thing: the entire electrical system would “flicker” on and off whenever the car went over a bumpy spot. (It also taught me the meaning of the phrase pray without ceasing!) I interrogated what few car-repair-related brain cells I had (which weren’t many, I’ll tell ya!) trying to solve it but never could. Then late one night I took it over to a friend’s house, and as I turned into his driveway he witnessed a shower of sparks shoot out from below the car! Well! That was all the clue I needed to finally track down the problem. Looking back, I realized there were two things I needed to solve this aggravating, problem: 1) the dark of night, and 2) a friend! Interesting metaphorical applications there, don’cha think?

Writing

This one’s easy. Early last year (2007) I discovered that telling stories was what I did best. That’s the point where I really began to, you know, write. But here’s the fun part: by daring to write, I learned that I could! How do I know that? Because you guys tell me so! Believe me; your wonderful support and encouragement is very much appreciated – so a big tip o’ the hat to ya!

Recreation

You can learn a lot about “plays well with others” when you play team sports. Teamwork can be a powerful force – particularly when managed properly. I’m still putting to use the lessons I learned as a kid from playing little league baseball, volleyball, and my sadly short (not quite two days) soccer career. You’ll never understand the power of synergy without it.

Friends

“A true friend is one who is walking in the door as everyone else is walking out.” Don’t know where I first saw that, but it’s always stuck with me. C’mon now – who hasn’t realized that life can be pretty darned lonely without friends? (Although I have to admit; I was a slow learner on this one.) Luckily, I turned out to be teachable. In fact, I’m enjoying a double blessing on this one: my own best friend also happens to be Mrs. MZM!

Food

Could food just be one of those “penultimate” fundamental metaphors for people? (That means near-universally applicable, in case you’re wondering.) I mean, think about it (sound of grinding gears); there are just about an endless variety of colors, flavors, textures, looks, smells, and tastes; you can mix and match for new and enjoyable combinations (and some not-so-great); some are better when cooked, while some are perfect just as they are – I could go on and on. Quite a smorgasbord, wouldn’t you say? [Ed. - Thanks for the correction, Brad! I knew there was somethin' I forgot to check!]

Time

When I was a kid I used to imagine what it would be like to be able to stop the flow of time at will. Silly idea, I know, but who knew there were other, more effective ways to alter the flow of time – and you don’t even need a fancy machine to do it, either! For instance, as we get older, time seems to accelerate. Also, isn’t the surest way to slow time down to a crawl is to have to wait for something really wonderful to happen? And surely you’ve noticed how quickly time can fly when you’re having fun? See? Turns out we’re all masters of time!

Technology

If there’s any ONE thing I’ve learned from technology, it’s to not be afraid of something you can’t understand. ‘Cause frankly, there’s a LOT I don’t understand! Alas, I’m almost strictly a user these days. But back when personal computers started to appear on the scene, I just started tinkering… and learning… and pretty soon I discovered how to do stuff with ‘em. And now look – they are literally everywhere! Good thing I wasn’t afraid to try something new.

Children

It comes full circle, doesn’t it? We spend all our time as a kid trying to grow up so we can be an adult. Then, when we become adults, we realize how much fun we used to have as a kid. But the truth is we can have the best of both worlds if we just “let ourselves go” even a tiny bit. Go ahead; try it: do something completely childlike. You might be surprised how much fun you’ll have.

Relatives

There’s an old saying: You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose; but you can’t pick your friend’s nose relatives. It’s always entertaining to take a look at the ol’ family tree, isn’t it? I mean, if you stop to think about it, there’s an awful lot of interesting stories in there. But unless we take the time to dig them out, they just sorta crumble away. I have to admit to falling somewhat short on this one, but I’ve learned that folks who have lived a few years, well, they have some interesting things to say. Might be worth lookin’ into, don’t you think?

Heroes

To be honest, I’ve never been one to really get into the comic superhero stuff. Even as a teenager, although I sometimes enjoyed reading comics featuring such superheroes as Superman, Batman or the Archie and the Gang, I knew these guys couldn’t be, you know, real. But then came Spiderman. Now here was a guy I could empathize with: he was a geek, he was too embarrassed to talk to girls, he had trouble finding balance in his life – and even after becoming Spiderman, he seemed to spend most of his time, not fighting crime, but just tryin’ to figure out how to make ends meet! In fact, he was a lot like me (other than the cool costume, and the ability to, you know, climb walls). I actually gained a measure of self-confidence from that.

Pets

If you’ve ever had a pet, then you’ve learned about the care and feeding of a creature that pretty much totally depends on you. Up until I was a college student, we usually shared our lives with a cat and/or a dog, and I can’t think of too many better lessons learned about responsibility. I learned a lot from those guys, like faithfulness, patience, acceptance… the list goes on and on.

Space

As a science fiction fan, I learned at least one thing: there’s room out there for almost anything! I just love the endless variety of possibilities you can find in sci-fi; it’s about my favorite brain stimulation exercise. Come to think of it, don’t you think endless possibilities is what life is all about, too?

Mountains

So many metaphors, so little time… but let’s try this one. While on a ski trip to Breckenridge, Colorado, one evening I stepped outside and found myself looking down at the town below us. (Our condo was on the side of the mountain above the town, so we had a great view.) The night was spectacularly clear under a star-filled sky. Off to one side, the moon’s gentle light gave the snow a soft, mysterious glow. Below us, the little town looked exactly like a string of multi-colored Christmas lights dropped into the snow. It was incredibly beautiful… and it made me realize something. “Up here”, one could find peace, quiet, tranquility and time to think. “Down there”, one had restaurants, clubs, shops, people and activity. What you experienced depended entirely on where you happened to be standing. The fact is we need both points of view.

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So there ya go; lessons learned from just about everything! Come to think of it, writing this post has been fun, and it sparked so many memories, well, don’t be surprised if you see some full-fledged posts on these topics over the next few weeks and months.

Well whaddayaknow; yet another lesson: how to brainstorm blog topics!

[Hey, if you'd like to participate in this month's What I Learned From... group writing project, well, we'd love to have ya! The good news is, there's still plenty of time - unlike the usual WILF project, this time you have two weeks to write your entry! That's right; we'll be open for entries through Sunday night May 18. So don't just sit there like a bump on a pickle; read the kickoff post for all the details, then come join us!]